Hey everyone! Just wanted to make a quick blog post, consider this as an update. Again.
So not everything is going as I'm expecting it but I'm trying to stay calm because hey, I can do this shi@t.
I'm still going to New York but I'm not going to take any courses at the Fashion Institute of Technology. At least not now. On September I'll have some time to settle and then I might take some courses and an internship and I can't really tell you any details because I don't even know what my life is gonna be like out there.
I was thinking that maybe on September, since I'll have the time to take long walks, walk around Soho, go to the Brooklyn bridge, do things I didn't do till now and generally be a tourist I could blog every week? I really want to put more effort into what I'm doing. Maybe start my youtube channel? Because lets be honest, school is over, I have a whole year before I start uni to do great things like focus on my blog and see places and have experiences. I don't want to waist my life waiting for the right moment. I might be afraid of the thought that I'll be in New York without my beloved ones but I've always been strong (at least I'm trying). My feelings shouldn't stop me from chasing my dreams.
Homesickness is a thing. Thinking about it though only makes it worse.
I have the chance to start over. Live out of my comfort zone. And that's a good thing right?
I've been trying for the past few days to remind myself that it's okay to be alone sometimes. That I don't need someone to hold me. I'm only 17 years old (well I'll be 18 in a month but lets be fair), I barely had a chance to breathe it/life in. I deserve more good moments. More bad experiences. I deserve to feel sadness, to feel happiness, excitement, pain, inspiration, wholeness, love etc. To feel anything life has to offer me.
I know I'm saying these things a lot. But these are my constant thoughts. I know that my life in the city will be much more exciting for blogging because of all the places I'll get to visit there, and it will be such a better place for my studies and career. But I'm just too young to not be afraid of the dark.
xx Faidra Tzedakis